Schooled

Theme of the Last Three Weeks: Getting Schooled (ok not for LL, but he’s about to learn a whole lot soon!)

I never understood why parents said they cried about kindergarten starting. It’s the next adventure, I said! Your kid is ready for this, I said! They’ll make great friends, I said! It’s such a fun age, I said! Well, let’s just say that while acknowledging their accuracy, I ate those words for breakfast - along with some delicious quiche and fruit- while sporadically leaking into more tears with mama friends at a “boo hoo” breakfast after dropping Addie off for her first day of kindergarten. Sure, I was absolutely excited and proud and thrilled for my kiddo to start her next adventure. But one forgets how creative a parent’s imagination can be when feeling both hopeful and nervous for their child. I had an impressive list of worries going that included but were not limited to: her being scared, getting lost on the way to the bathroom, ease of making friends, a school shooting (that fear will never subside because America can’t figure this crap out), the teacher’s style, sitting all day, mean kids making fun of Addie’s wacky fashion, etc.  I’d say it was a nice plethora of both legit and ridiculous worries. As a parent, you just want your kid to be safe and happy, and for the first time in 6 years, I was not running the show. Letting go did not feel nearly as joyful as Elsa makes it out to be.  However, I did think of Dory in Finding Nemo when Marlin says he promised his son nothing would ever happen to him, and she answers, “Well that’s a funny thing to promise. You can't never let anything happen to him. Then nothing would ever happen to him. Not much fun for little Harpo…”   You know, fish wisdom.  

So anyway, Adalyn got quiet in the carpool line the first morning, asked if I could walk her in (I didn’t realize this was an option, enter #momguilt), and then she barely whispered hello to the teacher unloading. But she gave me a little wave, put on her Wonder Woman backpack, stood up straight, and walked into school. Whoever saw me drive away probably got a good chuckle as I was straight up ugly-crying. She looked so little and so grown up in the same moment.

Spoiler alert: kindergarten is really fun.

We started at Perrymont, which for the record, was a great experience…small class, a sweet teacher and aide, adventures like scavenger hunts and a funny PE teacher named Mr Hoop, and teachers/staff who were very helpful and kind and greeted the kiddos every day.  Last year, we had applied for the lottery at TC Miller, which is a School of Innovation but still a city/public school…mostly neighborhood kids, with spaces in every class for kids from all over the city. Three days into school, they started pulling kids from the waitlist, so when we got that call, we decided to make the switch. It’s a delightful community of learning where they are all about fun and field trips, art and plays, science experiments, friends and lego challenges, and trusting the teachers to do their job and students to own their experience. Adalyn’s room doesn’t even have set desks right now because the kids spend so much time moving around. From a kindergartner’s perspective, highlights include:

·       A whole room for crafts!

·       Rhyme Moves (a dance you do whenever you hear a rhyme)

·       Jobs after lunch (“You only do 3 sprays on the table, Mom”)

·       Making alphabet soup

·       Writing a sentence and letters on the board

·       Breathing time (Go Noodle!)

·       New friends …we now remember maybe 6 whole names!

·       The climby-thing on the playground

·       Being first in line when they blow the whistle

·       Learning about squares and math

·       Hide and Seek

·       The bathroom that’s painted like an ocean

·       The Bus

Oh the bus. As someone who never rode a bus for school, hoping my 5 year old got home safely on one was slightly terrifying. I met a parent who said it well – we make them wear a helmet on a dang scooter in the driveway, and then we tell them, hey climb on this giant bus without seatbelts and get yourself home.  Sheaff made fun of me for being nervous until they forgot her on the bus the second day. Apparently she didn’t sit in the right seat, and since our stop was new on the route a week into school, they did the whole route before I called in a panic. They turned around to bring her an hour after she was supposed to be home. She thought it was pretty fun. Her mom, not so much.

After a week and a half of waiting to go to school too, Bria finally got to start back up! She is a little bummed that she can’t ride the bus home, and has requested multiple times “Mama you no walk in to get me. You do carpool!” Kids’ version of therapy to get their parents out of hovering mode. We’ve been at Peakland for a few years now, so while there are some new faces, the halls and classrooms and teachers and routine feel like home. Now, it’s a lot harder to get scoop from a 3 year old about her day, especially as she seems to require about 20 minutes of space out time after school in which she can zone out in complete silence and stare at air. At first I was a little worried, then realized this is probably what I look like at 9pm every night.

Highlights from Bria  post-space-out include:

·       The playground

·       Friends: “I no member their names. Dat’s hard.”

·       B for Bria

·       The sandbox

·       Eating (her whole lunch ,which is a gd miracle)

·       “They gon’ fix tires on playground”

·       Her teacher: “What her name is?”

·       Stickers of all types

·       Carpool

Everyone asks how Bria is doing with Adalyn being gone, and frankly, she’s pretty peachy with solo time with toys and Mama. Because I don’t worry enough, I’ve added middle child syndrome to my list of worries, wanting to make sure Bria doesn’t feel left out with kindergarten on one end and new baby on the other. However, simply saying yes most of the time to “You wan’ play wis me, Mama?” seems to the most solid parenting strategy for that. Apparently, all I need to do is play doctor, listen to Frozen songs (ugh), follow her tricycle race car path, and play with the little figurines like Peppa and Doc which consists of Bria carrying on full conversations and me adding a sentence or two every half hour.

While Bria enjoys her alone time, when Adalyn gets home, she and Wallie react about the same. Squeal, wag their tails, run to the bus stop, jump on Addie for hugs, and request the backpack to dig for treasures from school. Then they play – aka Adalyn loudly instructs a chosen activity, 90% of which she clearly just learned from school.

Finally, there’s the whole pregnant thing. We have 5 weeks left till due date; likely 4 weeks left till we deliver. We had been so worried about this baby growing well, but the lovenox shots have worked wonders….we are thinking that this placenta is actually functioning, and functioning well to provide nourishment, thus why LL is already bigger than any of our other babies when they were born. Normally preeclampsia is starting to creep in at this point with me (crappy-placenta-related). Blood pressure goes up, other numbers go wonky, and risk of seizures and strokes and such is apparently not great. So typically, we have to induce early to avoid the latter joys. At this point, my blood pressure has stayed pretty chill, weirding all of us out. Normal is not our MO, especially in pregnancies. Erin has us set up to be monitored closely, and we’ve got multiple options/plans depending on what my somewhat unpredictable self decides to do these next few weeks.

In the meantime, we have a nursery, diapers and drawers of darn cute little boy clothes, and two very excited big sisters waiting. The reality that we will have a third little human in this house to take care of is both wildly exciting and a wee bit terrifying. LL is a mover and I’m pretty sure is practicing kick boxing in there; given this is the last time we’ll do this, I’m trying to take in these moments and feel total gratitude for them. I do feel guilty if I’m not enjoying every moment of pregnancy, wanting to remain totally thankful to be uncomfortably far along! I have many moments of joy; moments of grief; moments of anticipation; moments of inability to get off the floor in a graceful fashion… Erin has reassured me that the physical/emotional rollercoaster of third trimester is okay. She has also warned Sheaff that I’m pretty much off the hook for marital homicide at this point in the pregnancy, so to be cool. :D  Luckily, he brings me ice cream every night while we watch Fixer Upper and discuss best ideas for shiplap.

That sums up our world from the last few weeks! Thanks to our amazing village for the continuous outpouring of love and support for our family. Hashtag blessed?!? But for real, we are. I’m not kidding when I say it means the world to have so many by our sides, walking this journey with us on all fronts! From sprinkles, to group text messages about kindergarten, to wonderful visits with family and friends here and on the road…all of it…we are so lucky to have you all.

Stay tuned!